an innate defense?

Woke up at 9:00 today with a pounding headache and nausea. Called in sick, but felt so guilty I still went in at 17:00 to do my on-call tonight. I was sure I had set my alarm clock, but while I had adjusted the alarm to 07:00, had accidently neglected to switch it on. I feel (physically) much better for sleeping in (slept until lunchtime today, then tidied up for the first time in weeks). Perhaps if I had set my alarm clock I would have been well on my way to killing myself from overwork. (Certainly came near to collapse on Saturday) I did long days (13 hours shifts) on monday, friday and saturday of last week, would have had one today, have got one on wednesday and one on sunday. With only coming saturday off in what would have been 21 consecutive working days. Perhaps my body is trying to tell me something. I can't win though. Every time I take days off, I have to swap all my on-calls, therefore doubling the on-calls before and after my holiday. So I spend my holiday being ill and then come back to...Hell. Yes, my life at the moment is a living hell - chronic sleep deprivation (by far the worst thing) and trudging up and down corridors with a bleep that goes off continually. Being so utterly worn out on your one day off that you are unable to enjoy the people and things you value in life. I have nothing interesting to say today. Work ceases to be interesting when it becomes all-consuming.